Happy Earth Day , you disgusting mass of consumers ! What well way to celebrate than with a round - up of the worst eco - friendly , lecturing movies ? We also include a few “ green ” films that wo n’t make you find bludgeoned by a tree diagram .
Worst Earth Day Messages In Movies, Ever
The Day After Tomorrow
Movie Message : Your contaminate lifestyle has led to the melting of the polar icecaps , which disrupt the North Atlantic current . And then we ’re all fucked . You foul fuzz . Why ca n’t you motor a Prius , get educated , and recycle – like tangle scientist Dennis Quaid ? Unless you are a better person and stay put behind with grim kids in hospitals , you will give-up the ghost in a ardor tornado , or an onset by rime savage . Recycle , or at least start stockpiling goods to assist you confront the next ice geezerhood . Also , we should really be prissy to Mexico .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Bottom personal credit line , the FX and idea in this moving picture are coolheaded as blaze . Even though the execution and actions select by each character are exceptionally stunned , were n’t you secretly wishing for the next awesome - looking ice long time while watching ? A massive combined flood , tornado and Baron Snow of Leicester attack could easily save you from recognition poster debt and annoying business , and activate the chance to be the everyday hero you always knew you could be . The “ save the Earth ” subject matter was wholly suffer in the “ What would you do ? ” fantasise . It lead us allege , “ allow ’s flush it the polar ice rink caps and jailor with the currents now . I ’m quick , I ’ve make two crates of baked beans in my basement and footie pajamas . permit ’s do this . ”
Highest Point of taint : It ’s been enounce before and we ’re going to say it again , the frost ladder fit . Absolutely pathetic .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-4xBWXLUi4
2012
Movie Message : We ’ve changed the Earth ’s nitty-gritty temperature , somehow , it ’s not really explain . But I ’m sure it ’s something you did , or the Mayans .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Unlike The Day After Tomorrow , if you ’re not one of the lucky productive people on the witching Noah ’s Ark , you ’re screwed . So what ’s the point ? We ’re all gon na die anyways . It says so in Earth ’s day of the month book .
high pointedness of Contamination : The final point of view off , when Chiwetel Ejiofor is pleading with Oliver Platt to open up the ark doors and let the residuum of the the great unwashed inside the gravy boat . Then they do and everyone almost pass away . The answer is always , “ elusive shit , the great unwashed . If it ’s you or me , it ’s always get to be me . ” Plus their imbecile understanding almost got the last bits of the human subspecies killed .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrzOUA3z9vA
Avatar
Movie Message : Do n’t muddle with the natives and their magical soul tree diagram .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Why is being a Na’vi so great anyways ? The moving-picture show never full explore the depth of this civilization – instead , it treats the Na’vi like such a single - minded cliche that it ’s hard to sympathize with them when they are exterminated by the other massive cliche in this film , Colonel Quaritch . All understanding and emotional impact are lost when deal with the disaster that befalls this exotic race – because we do n’t have it away much about them besides the fact that they can have sex with their hair . It ’s only when the moving picture deals with single characters like Neytiri that we really feel understanding .
Highest Point of Contamination : The New Age intone around the magic someone Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree , with all the swaying natives and the will o’wisps .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYHfJks15jY
Star Trek IV : The Voyage house
Movie Message : Whales .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Whales ?
high-pitched Point of Contamination : Whales .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PLQ1XfaTuU
Fern Gully
moving-picture show Message : Pollution is really triggered by a tattle smoke colossus who voice a lot like Tim Curry . Do n’t relinquish the monster stick in the tree , humans , or he ’ll hack down the rainfall woodland .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Look , I love Fern Gully . But it does n’t really learn you much about make unnecessary the Earth , other than Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree feel pain when you cut them down . Plus Hexxus is such a tough seat , how can you not urge on for him over the honest-to-goodness fairies and their tree menage ?
Highest gunpoint of Contamination : The aphrodisiac Tim Curry contamination Hexxus singing about “ Toxic Love , ” it ’s a foul / awesome view .
Happy Feet
Movie substance : If you over fish the waters / contaminate them you are killing off lovely penguins , whom we only get it on because they can trip the light fantastic toe , and babble out .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Animals are awesome because they can do joke for us . Ugly brute who ca n’t trip the light fantastic toe are so get it on .
Highest Point of Contamination : When people send the main part penguin back to his native land after it ’s discovered he can dance . Never in a million years would this materialize . That pitiable matter would be electrocuted and put on the stage to trip the light fantastic toe for the masses at $ 100 a pop , until he died of enfeeblement .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9s7afoYI-M
Wall - E
Movie Message : You are a fat , repelling , lazy sloven . And you ’re going to destroy everything . Consumerism is eeeeevil , but please buy tickets to our movie , popcorn , candy , soda water , a Wall - eastward plushie , Wall - einsteinium t - shirts and anything else we can quickly manufacture and slap a price tag on .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : It ’s really not , it ’s a swell movie , it ’s that the message about us being lazy polluters is a little ham - fisted .
Highest Point of pollution : The tidal wave of cartilage - based nubbin flesh fatties in the very end . Little much , Pixar . But I still opine this is a great movie . Plus they really thought out how the human species would lento break up into be adrift consumer blobs who will do whatever they are told .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lt5e5axzKBA
The Happening
Movie substance : The plants are going to kill you because you are killing them , in a group , raging at your possibly unfaithful wife , or any other rationality that M. Night Shyamalan can think of to make his characters kill themselves in preposterously hysteric manners . countenance ’s not forget the lion death chronological sequence .
Why It ’s Toxic Waste In A Biodegradable Wrapper : Besides the fact that Mark Wahlberg is such a idiotic role player that any reception he has to anything tump over the earnestness of the “ depicted object matter . ” The subject matter itself make dead no sense . We really do n’t know why the plants are killing homo , or when plants suddenly resolve to originate the ability to discern different human emotion . Then the independent characters have to run aside from the wind – the wind ! The whole moving-picture show is a confusing pile of garbage .
Highest Point of Contamination : Everything . Every individual moment in this movie is tainted . Here ’s a compendium of some of the grim points from this flick .
Earth Day-esque Movies We Recommend:
nighttime of the Lepus and Black Sheep
Experimenting on animals is incorrect . Especially when that means you could turn into a roue thirsty one-half sheep , half human monstrosity . Learn why we must honour animals and their innate habitat the veracious direction . By check animals mutate into kill machines with tart pointy fangs .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31QUOUxqz2 M
The Planet of The Apes
Nuclear War is bad , unless that entail the apes get to take over and you get a hot bikini model bride , then it ’s pretty win - winnings for everyone , if you could hold up the fall out . But in all honesty , nothing top the bragging reveal at the end of the original Apes . Plus , not only does it make you need to be nicer to our simian brothers , but it piddle you think twice about push the large red push . You ca n’t embrace with atomic arm , you guy .
Princess Mononoke
Besides the fact that Hayao Miyazaki ’s Princess kicks so much ass , her friendly forest pals are the things mellifluous acid dreams are made of . This plastic film does n’t take disforestation lightly , and it ’s warfare on the Tataraba mining company , motherfuckers . I ’ll be on team green if it entail I get to depend upon a giant wolf into conflict , any day .
The Toxic Avenger
In all actuality this movie makes me want to foul , because how else am I going to bring this hilarious teras / superhero to life ? But on the flip side , Toxie does n’t take kindly to defiler , so it ’s probably better to keep our act clean . Do n’t bedding material , kids , or the Toxic Avenger will rip your arms off .
This post in the first place appear on io9 on April 22 , 2010 .
AvatarPlanet of the ApesPrincess MononokeSheepStar TrekThe HappeningWaterworld
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